June 2011
5 posts
RT @rhodri: Brilliant RT @timwalker: For entertainment alone, it’s worth reading Matt Taibbi’s totally non-neutral Bachmann takedown htt …
RT @chris_coltrane: lol homeopathy. RT @lou_hurst: Q. What are you waiting for? A. “proper peer reviewed evidence” #Glastonbury http://t …
RT @StantonWarriors: What’s the difference between God & Bono? God won’t be wandering around Glastonbury festival thinking he’s Bono. #U2
Did my regular testicular cancer check/wank. Found a lump. It was a fold in my scrotum #testiclewatch
I’ve hurt my knee by the way. It may explode.
May 2011
9 posts
Who’d have thought. Screaming and randomly pressing buttons can fix a knackered PC.
RT @Buentes: I’m thinking about bondage atoms #sexyscience @mrblackett
RT @Inbedwimaradona: OH MY GOD!!! TURNS OUT GLEN HODDLE WAS THE TALENTED ONE http://bit.ly/ltwKwJ
RT @riklomas: MMORPG v IRL: http://bit.ly/mEPvru
Considering a career writing sarcastic letters to councils. I’m fucking brilliant at it.
Fight?
RT @bloggerheads: If you dislike sofa salesmen, this is unlikely to turn you around http://youtu.be/_GGn4pY0pf4
RT @justmckeat: Dicks: http://bit.ly/le8WKo
RT @SkyNews: Reaction: World Leaders Hail Obama’s Death http://bit.ly/kQl4Un
March 2011
14 posts
Why Sky? Why do we need to see Sandro being sick?
Just seen the Alves goal. Curvy.
RT @DTguardian: Best moment of the evening so far: Mario Balotelli and his bib http://www.twitvid.com/AHCJ1 (via @DoronSalomon) #MCFC
RT @jamesappell: Players beaten and threatened? My latest piece for @FootballRamble on the violent goings-on at Kuban Krasnodar http://o …
Switched to Bayern v Inter on the recommendation of Twitter. Whatever life was in this game will now disappear.
Think you’re hot shit? Think you live the high life? Well fuck all y’all. I just fed the ducks at the park. Like a boss.
Say what you like about Scott Parker, he has the most sensible haircut in the Premiership.
My falling down the stairs tweet looks a bit pathetic now. Japan, I’m thinking of you.
RT @BeyondthePitch: Jonathan WIlson’s (@jonawils) up close look at The Blizzard & social trends in football - we recommend @blzzrd highl …
Fell down the stairs. Completely unhurt. I am unbreakable.
Trust me Fred. Being called a banker is the least of your worries #FredGoodwinisaCunt
Who wants to explain to Chiles the difference between a ‘neutral’ and someone who wants Spurs to win because they’re the English team?
RT @qriporg: Kaleidoskop (Radio Eins) – 2011-03-05 – Jazzanova - http://tinyurl.com/647r4co
RT @Notorious_Indi: fucking hell, Nani’s injury: http://bit.ly/fZv5Yy - I’d cry too with a gash like that on my leg.
November 2010
63 posts
The best thing about this as a Northerner is all the plastic Geordies in my social networks who predicted a Sunderland spanking look daft.
I have twenty cans of driving lager and a severe cold. I don’t know how today is going to end.
RT @antonvowl: Haha, few things more delightful than an Ashley Cole fuckup.
Not that supporting a team located 50 miles from where you were born doesn’t already make you looks like a twat.
I bet Ray Wilkins is shitting himself with laughter right now.
RT @jackofkent: Captured @FollowersInNeed Twitter account the moment after the old owners changed its name ;-)
RT @jackofkent: Now strongly suspect @FollowersInNeed is sham vanity account. If so, saddening as it discredits genuine efforts. Await …
The saddest thing about this whole @followersinneed scam is all the disappointed tweets pleading with the rotten cunt not to stop.
RT @HelenWayte: DOES NOT COMPUTE! “McDonald’s and PepsiCo to help write UK health policy” http://tiny.cc/mvaoc
RT @DanRebellato: Shit! If you don’t practice your scales I’m going the blow this place sky high!! #iamsparkysmagicpiano
RT @VizTopTips: TERRORISTS. Don’t use twitter to post jokey references to your upcoming attacks, the authorities are shit hot on this. / …
Whoops. Very nearly confused Twitter with my SMS service. You don’t want to know what you nearly just read (clue: there was poo and spunk).
RT @TheFagCasanova: Ah, well that explains it then… http://twitpic.com/35ww23 #twitterjoketrial #seeyouincourt
Shame Gareth Compton has killed his Twitter acc. He wouldn’t be able to see people support him while calling him a prick. #twitterjoketrial
RT @newsarse: NEWS! Two million tedious students already claiming ‘I was there, man’ http://bit.ly/913LIq
RT @Heresy_Corner: Heresy Corner: With the Conviction of Paul Chambers, it is now illegal to be English http://bit.ly/9gXVAu #twitterjok …
Turns out it wasn’t on Twitter that I called for Madeley’s death. I definitely did though. Possibly an old blog. He is a twat.
RT @BBCNews: Tory councillor Gareth Compton arrested and bailed over Tweet calling for writer Yasmin Alibhai-Brown to be stoned to death
No-one tell the CPS that somewhere in my Twitter timeline I call for the assassination of Richard Madeley.
My mate Sam has done a music. Let him know what you think. http://snd.sc/aLgEGG
Stop everything! I have a cold! Someone fetch me Lucozade then stroke my hair.
Carlos Tevez has a great band: http://mysp.ac/gq4PR